Anxiety: 3 Ways to Identify the Root Cause

There are so many ways that anxiety seems to rear its ugly head in a society that treasures achievement, sometimes to the detriment of living itself.

Strong words, maybe, but i am not here to tread lightly as i have no desire to coddle anyone when it comes to living victoriously in the love of life.

It seems as if we are expected to “be” so much, are we not?

But sometimes in the very act of becoming, we simply forget to just “Be.” We allow so many influences, from family and friends, to society-at-large, to set the tone for our living. We become, then, filled with an angst that stems from so many voices crying out to us, seeming in our own heads. It is the call of expectations of all in our lives who demand that we are “more”, whatever that is.

More than what? More than who? And more importantly, WHY?

The past beacons us, our “so-called” failures beseech us, our ego compares us and we sink deeper into the abyss, often falling on the weight of fears of a future that we can not support or even imagine.

Why are you anxious? What are the signs and symptoms we should be dealing with here? And, the real question; Who are you in the process?

As a Life Coach, this is the area that seems to be the most pressing for most i encounter. Anxiety, worry, angst, depression...they are all tied into a precarious knot that can doom many and even lead few to consider even taking their own lives.

But there is always a core that the anxiety covers and that is the journey we take to discover the beauty of living in the Present Moment, for here is where all truth lives. This is the Now Moment that we find a way up and out and into a new way of living.

But the ultimate truth is always our own journey that must be discovered. To truly rid yourself of the anxiety in any situation, or just in your daily living, you must do some basic self-reflection steps to have the insight to move forward. Be it with a Life Coach, or through meditation, or just taking yourself fishing...whatever it takes to gain some clarity, it needs to be done.

My father had a peculiar saying that he would spout when Alzheimer's had taken its grip on him and that was, “Hey, did you stop and smell the roses?”

Seemingly out of nowhere, he would interject the saying into conversations. Now my father would occasionally say that growing up, usually as a glib saying, but the simple fact is that there is an ultimate truth here for life. It is a quote that is thrown about so much that we do sometimes forget its significance.

A famous golfer, Ben Hogan, said it beautifully when he said, “As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.”

3 Ways to Begin the Transition Away from Anxiety

Anxiety is a far reaching subject, to be sure, but as it was in the theatre, to get ready for the production of any theatrical production, there are things that have to happen before we even get to rehearsals. We have to consider a lot of factors before even choosing the show and consider all of the elements that go into the production.

The three ways we begin the process is similar then to getting ready for a show; separation, reflection and connection.

When preparing for a show, the separation usually comes from a director getting with the board of directors to choose a vision for a production asking such questions such as, do we do a comedy or is a musical good now?

So when it comes to setting the stage for getting to the heart of your anxiety, you must be willing to prepare.

Step 1: Separation

The goal is to separate ourselves in an atmosphere free from distractions; yes that means your precious smart phone, tablet or laptop.

Silence is golden here.

Take time for yourself to free yourself from the rush and crush of life for a bit.

The Second Step: Self Reflection

This is the step that may be the most heartfelt, or should be. This is you identifying the root core and being completely honest with who and where you are in this current moment. Putting all angst aside, you are indeed present in this moment.

So in this Now Moment, the worry that brought you to this point has nothing to do with this moment, so drop it. You are here, be here completely Now. Do not allow the future that your ego is painting for you to exist. Make your own rules, which leads us to the third step.

Step 3: Connection or Connectivity

Such as is preparation to start the theatrical production, these are the components that you have identified in your reflection stage that will move you away from angst; the concepts, people, places and things that you need to begin the process of looking towards the light that is your life. This is the process of the understanding that there is always a way forward.

In the end, it is a solitary journey that opens itself up to the resources the Universe provides for those who are willing to allow for a brighter future. Anxiety is not a way to live in this Present Moment and has no place here. Let’s begin the process together for while it is indeed a solitary journey, you are never alone.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Journey of Enlightenment, Part III; The Flow of it All

One would think that flow is all anyone ever really does, as if we have a choice. But that is the very nature of Flow, we do have a choice and yet so few seem to exist there within it.

First, a practical look at the definition and how we apply it to living in the Present Moment.

The dictionary definition simply states that Flow is simply the “moving along or out steadily and continuously in a current or stream: "from here the river flows north" and “The action or fact of moving along in a steady, continuous stream.”

There is another definition to flow that many words are not given and that is from a perspective of psychology.

Flow, in this instance, is defined as the mental state of operation in which a person in an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and success in the process of the activity.

Proposed by Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, the positive psychology concept has been widely referenced across a variety of fields.

According to Csíkszentmihályi, flow is completely focused motivation. It is a single-minded immersion and represents perhaps the ultimate in harnessing the emotions in the service of performing and learning. In flow, the emotions are not just contained and channeled, but positive, energized, and aligned with the task at hand.

To be caught in the ennui of depression or the agitation of anxiety is to be barred from flow.

The hallmark of flow is a feeling of spontaneous joy, even rapture, while performing a task, although flow is also described as a deep focus on nothing but the activity – not even oneself or one's emotions.

Colloquial terms for this or similar mental states include: to be on the ball, in the moment, present, in the zone, wired in, in the groove, or owning.

What is important to note from the standard definition of moving along or out steadily and continuously in a current or stream and the flow of complete focused motivation, the single-mindedness of it all, is the the principle of advancement in a natural and creative expression of nature. The river flows as it does and when we embark on a Flow within ourselves, we become a joyful creature, a true force of nature that moves at a constant and ever-evolving persona of love.

Flow becomes who we are and embodies our journey. There is nothing that determines how we flow or the way we should flow; We Just do in a way that is natural to us.

Here is where flow is interrupted, and it is at the core of the three step process of Release, Let Go and Flow. At the very heart of the process, there is a Dam that has blocked flow. Something that you have allowed in your life. For what ever reason that it has served you at the time, your Dam has stopped you from your true nature; the very art of Flowing into each new Now Moment.

As a kid, i witnessed the awesome power of the Mississippi River as storms caused it to leave its banks most every Spring. You see, the government, in its infinite wisdom, devised a series of dams along the river to "contain" the flow of the mighty Mississippi River.

Not so much.

When nature would intercede and the river would leave its banks, i was often amused as to the news reports of the damage that was caused because of the river doing what it was supposed to do, the very act of flowing. All of a sudden the river is a destructive force, but it was the very act of the government trying to control nature that was at the core of the destruction.

When nature decides to do what it does, we are simply in the way. Such is the nature of flow and the self-imposed Dams of life are at the heart of anxiety, worry and fear.

You see, we are creatures of flow that are supposed to have a natural rhythm, an ease to the way of living. If you have Dammed up your flow, then you must undo the unnatural aspects of your nature and return your life back over to you.

You must Release by forgiving.

You must Let Go by truly forgetting and deciding that you are the only one responsible for you; that no one else has input unless it is from a mentoring point-of-view that guides, but never insists on its own way.

You must then let nature, the very nature of who you are as an individual, allow Flow into each Present Moment alone, for therein lies your eternity.

Life truly begins when you have learned that the nature of Flow allows the very truth of who we are as eternal beings to enter and create our reality. For we are Love and from Love, all extends outward. Love is the creative force for all that we are and for all that we are to become.

Flow is Love and it is our nature to live free within the Flow.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

There is an interesting show on HBO, by the very name, Enlightened. In this show, a once high-powered executive, played brilliantly by Laura Dern, has a breakdown and is committed to a rehab clinic where she has an Enlightened moment of Supreme Consciousness.

Supreme Consciousness is as if, for a brief moment, (and that is what these moments are many times) a peace and serenity comes over your being. Your every waking moment from that point onward then becomes a re-creation of that moment in your expression of living.

Unfortunately, as Laura Dern’s character comes to find out, everyone is not on the same path as you, and it is unfathomable how anyone could not understand the journey as you are living it. I mean, it is very clear that enlightenment must be something that everyone desires, right? How is it that your new found place in the Universal Stream is not something desired by all?

This, then, becomes the disconnect. This, then, becomes the reason your ego steers you clear from “those” types, for it is not normal, this “enlightened” nonsense, and you certainly don’t ever want to be seen as “not normal”.

Right?

It has always fascinated me how the media paints "normalcy." But here is the thing...it is a moving target that changes by the shifting sands of time and societal nuances. The normal of today becomes the old-fashioned thinking of yesterday, and sometimes virtually overnight. If you want to see that really played out, look at computer magazines from merely five years ago. Heck, go back two years, that should do it. The computing world has changed so dramatically that simply having a cell phone two years old makes you outdated.

The same goes for normalcy as we define it. What does this have to do with enlightenment and the steps to begin the journey?

Everything, for you see this is a journey that leaves the boundaries of normalcy behind, for you are desiring a state of joy. Joy has no boundaries and is never out of fashion. Enlightenment is that journey that always begins within and creates change in a way that becomes your normal, without.

But many fear this journey because of the ego. In your attempts to reconcile even a fraction of enlightenment with your world, you must deal with the egoic world around you and that is the arena that the ego so delights in taking charge for it has had so much experience with it.

So there is this constant battle between the ego, future-based, whats-in it for-me thinking, and enlightenment, the serve-humanity-become-a-creature-of-love-in-all-circumstances thinking. This is definitely two words that cannot coexist in any way and to delude yourself into thinking that you can make them “play nice” together is a thinking that shall not bode well for you.

There is a fork in the road and no part of one can go with the other. Enlightenment and the ego are not partners, friends or symbiotic entities that could serve one another.

So the three steps, as alluded in the previous post, are a simple easy-to-remember trio of Release, Let Go and Flow, but living them is not so easy to do.

Step 1: Providing you have dealt with the ego, if nothing else but to acknowledge the fact that you have let it be the CEO for far too long, this is the easiest and yet, at the same time, the most difficult step. Again, the ego will really rear its ugly head here, but push onward. Release is really an act of forgiveness; of yourself, of the events, people, places and things that may have deposited you in this Now Moment.

There is no judgement here. It is as it is supposed to be and there is no desiring anything else to have happened. There are no “should of’s”, “if only’s” or “what if’s”. There is only Now and it is the moment that all is well.

Release and forgive all.

In the spiritual realm, forgiveness is the key for really moving forward. All spiritual doctrines have at their core the very concept of forgiveness. It is only when they attach some sort of gain or punishment that it becomes deluded and watered down as an ineffective vehicle for enlightenment.

But this is the step that begins the journey in earnest. This is the basis of the allowing the truth about yourself as a true child of the Universal Way. Once you have taken this step of forgiveness, true release can be the only truth that you know. It is as if you take from your eyes the “rose colored glasses” that people say when they (their ego) determines that you are living in some “la-la land” that is the journey of enlightenment. You now see in full color and the beauty of every Now Moment comes cascading to you.

For the clients i serve, i use the analogy of the hit program and movies, ‘The Highlander.”

In the series, there are those who are immortal, except for one small exception, other immortals can make them not-so-much by taking their head and gaining the one who lost their head their soul’s power. The liner from the show was, “There can be only one” meaning that only one Highlander was to remain at the end.

This is the process you must undergo in your path of forgiveness.

Metaphorically, you take take the “head” of all the situations in your life that have held you tied to the past or that has kept the present from advancing you into the glorious Now Moments that make up your future Now Moments. You take back the power you have allowed them to have.

Yes, part of the forgiving is that understanding that you cannot be a victim here. Yes, things may have happened that you did not desire, but you are not a victim, but one who overcomes; one who forgives and moves into the next step of Letting Go.

In the next post, we will see how the blending of these steps set you up to set your foot on the path of enlightenment, the Flow of it all.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Affliction of Worry From Others

Worry kills the spirit of the one it inhabits and infects those around them.

Why does this happen that a soul on a beautiful journey of love allows such an egoic, unhealthy and, very often, irrational look a a future that does not exist into their very existence.

Why has worry been given such a place of respect in our world.

It is even joked about as a redeeming trait in movies. But there lies the insidiousness of it, does it not? The idea that it is indeed fodder for ridicule and yet we allow it to still infect our lives. It as if we are saying it is funny for everyone else, but, its OK for me. As if somehow that makes it a great way to carry on in our Now Moments.

Of course, that is the point. In the wake of worry there are no Now Moments, only moments that are somehow "out there" that must be going to happen, must be dealt with now.

I could go on for many Now Moments here, but the most troubling aspect of worry is the way we allow others to impact our journey with their worrisome attitude. Really, when someone else worries about you in some situation and projects that worry on you, it is nothing but their ego rising to control you.

Let me give you an example of a client who recently took a tumble off of a ladder and broke his back.

Now this man has an excellent attitude and takes a very youthful approach to age in general. Well, after he recuperated, he came and saw me and was having some issues with the thoughts of others that he was allowing to impact him. Essentially, others were telling him that he should not go up on the ladder again. I asked him if he desired to, if he enjoyed getting up on the ladder doing things. He said that he did, that it was not a chore.

So we established that it was not something he dreaded but that he loved to do, he loved being active. I then asked if others were responsible for his happiness; could they determine his course.

He again said no.

I then told him that others were simply projecting fear onto him because that is how they would have handled their fear, more than likely. It even spoke to their wanting to control him by telling him he was not able to overcome a mere accident.

After we finished, he looked back at me as he left and said, “Thank you. I am so tired of others deciding for me my joy in any moment.” I told him that it was none of his business what others thought of his actions and, quite frankly, if he wanted to skydive, it was his business.

He did go up the ladder again!

You see, we have a way of inserting ourselves into the lives of others, often time in the very name of love and we couch it as “concern" (worry) for them. But really what is going on, is our ego is impacted by them and we are always, if ego-driven, looking to protect ourselves by maintaining that relationship on our terms.
In a way, it is like when we lose a loved one. We mourn, but it is always about the way we are affected. If it is someone close, we are affected as to the time that we no longer will spend with that person in our lives.

Not that it is good or bad, here. It just it is what it is.

But if we grieve past the normal stages of grief that have been studied from author, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, when she discusses the Five Stages of Grief, then we must look at the hold the ego has on the very act of living.

It is the same when it comes to the influence others have on you if you base your life on what others think of your actions. To be quite honest, however, you might be shocked just how little others are thinking about you. I am always amazed at the amount of ego that is present when someone is so invested in others thoughts of their actions. Often it is someone who is very self-conscious and seems very non-egoic, but it is usually just the opposite. Usually the ego has such a hold on them that they base every action on the ideas, words and presumed thoughts of others.

One of my favorite quotes i use for my clients is one from Dr. Seuss where he says,


“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”

It is your journey. Things are only Bad or Good in the context of the moment, but it is always your journey.

No one can worry you better, angry, happy or any other emotion that others desire to afflict you with.

Feel this Present Moment, for it is the only one you have.

Be your own creation and do not allow others in inflict their egoic natures on you, for they are on their own journey.

In the end, it really does come down to the fact that what others think of you is, indeed, none of your business...ever!

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Appreciation for the Mission in The Present Moment

Appreciation is the core value that manifest a Mission that truly reflects the very nature of the love of life. Appreciation is that beautiful nature that can’t be faked or manufactured, such as you see when Hollywood does with some Thanksgiving feast when a troubled family seemingly comes together and gives feigned appreciation.

For as far as i can remember, i was troubled at something at the way appreciation was portrayed along with the following season. Don’t get me wrong, it is grand to see people become Scrooges for if even for a brief season; the part where Scrooge is transformed, that is.

But only when i took my journey that has set me on my Mission to give people back themselves, did i really understand the depth of appreciation and what it actually does to the soul. It is my belief that at the heart of the very spiritual concept of faith is appreciation. It is appreciation that provides the prism for all of life. It is appreciation for life that we begin to see beyond ourselves.

It goes beyond the concepts of forced “thank yous” we all had to give when our aunt gave us the scarf we didn’t really like, or some other manifested reason appeared that we should be thankful for.

It is in the well-meaning actions of those who loved us that we were given such a skewed look at the very meaning of appreciation in our lives. So many times it comes off as a forced look at a guilt reaction of what someone has done for us. So the appreciation then becomes a bitter pill you swallow that has no meaning outside of the words you utter. Guilt becomes appreciation to the ego and resentment often nest deep within it.

I see it often times with the very act of gift giving where someone gives a gift, expects appreciation, which you have been taught to do, and then proceeds to tell you at some future time, that because they gave you a gift, that a certain action should now be manifest, be it love or some supposed show of love. The ego then drills down to the act of the forced appreciation that you did and begins to feed on the very act of appreciation as a ploy or ruse and bitterness begins to accumulate. Love and appreciation are often time so linked that one would believe that they must coexist together.

Yes and No. For you see, if you come from a place of love, appreciation is at the heart of everything you do, but appreciation must never demand love. Make sense?

This is one of the hardest values to really uncover, for most will tell you that appreciate this and that in their lives, but you can see that appreciation is not their core. To breech this with clients, i often get to the very act of gift giving and have found that most have had (or do) the “weapons of gifts”, as i like to call them, inflicted on them.

What i must first get most over is that a gift, defined in the dictionary as, “A thing given willingly to someone without payment.” is just that.

In the spiritual realm it is often why so many have a hard time with a gift of salvation, in that our ego knows that there are always strings attached, so there is nothing “freely given.” So getting people past that attitude and the very act of doing that to others as well, is the first hurdle. When you can get ego to release the assumptions of gifts, of giving and of the very nature of appreciation, then we can begin to give you back your life starting from that point.

Appreciation is the core value of the Mission for your life and for living from a place of love. Here is where we begin to master looking beyond yourself and seeing that life is indeed a Mission that you are involved in.
Let’s look at three ways to begin the process of Appreciation, but know that we have only touched the surface of having a true Attitude of Gratitude.

In my morning journal practice, i begin with “thank you thank you thank you” and i truly mean it. This is the act of preparation to receive from an attitude of being thankful for all within your life.

First, then, would be to prepare yourself by being thankful form the outset for EVERYTHING. Nothing must exist within your realm that is not appreciated.
In the movie, “A Wonderful Life”, George Bailey, played by Jimmy Stewart, has just discovered that he is back from being “non-existent” and is running down his little street of Bedford Falls. As he is doing so, appreciation for every aspect of his little town spews from his mouth. All of those places he took for granted, now had a new meaning and he appreciated everything for what it was to him. He now lived in an attitude of gratitude and in that light he saw his Mission for living and that he had been on a Mission without really understanding it.

Next, after you have truly given yourself over to appreciation of everything, there is an aspect of release that you must do. Forgiveness must now be your nature. First yourself, and, then, all other people, places and things that the ego has told you have wronged you in any way. This is a process, but one that must take place to move forward. Living free from here means you can now move beyond yourself to a Mission mindset.

Finally, in our simple three step appreciation appreciation manifestation, is to release worry, which is a task in and of itself that affects your Mission, the going beyond yourself to impact humanity.

In the next post we shall proceed form that point and deal with worry as it is a challenge that must have its own discussion.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Mission of the Vision

Vision was discussed in relation to goals in the previous post as something to aspire to.

Briefly we discussed goals as merely a subset of the larger vision of a life with a purpose, a Mission for your eternal pursuits.

However, in this ego-driven culture, Mission is often left to those ‘starving artist” and those who dedicate their selves to helping those in need in some remote part of the world or in some place of dire need in our own country.

A Mission often seems to be left to politicians that supposedly have the social good in mind, which we usually discover is seldom the case. Even the very definition of Mission from the dictionary alludes to missions from a standpoint of political and humanitarian efforts.

Therein lies the disconnect.

When we look at Mission then in the eyes of a cynical world, and with an ego that is constantly looking out for your own interest, it seems that a Mission is not really something that everyone is involved in, or should be, for far too many have corrupted the very meaning of the word.

The eternal creator of the universe did not set us adrift to be at the whim of a society that cares not but, in the eternal scheme of it all, desires nothing more than people with vision to lead them into a new age of enlightenment.

Here is where the ego usually shuts the discussion down as Enlightenment, Vision and Missions are certainly not practical. The egoic mind desires only to keep you forever tied to the past and worried about the future in a way to keep you focused on self-preservation, there will certainly be no talk of a Mission outside of yourself, for that is the very act of acknowledging an eternal presence that has no place in the ego-centric mind. Mission stuff is “out there” and reality is nothing more than your failures of the past and of the future, which is always to be worried about.

Often the heartaches of the past, the ego will tell you, would not even allow you to think that YOU, of all people, could have a Mission that could impact the world. This is precisely why you should think of a Mission for your life. Yes, it is tied to Vision and the two are usually so interwoven that it seems to be a daunting task to even conceive of it.

The ego tells you that you are not worthy for greatness, that you cant change the world, that “out there” pursuits are best left to those who are rich, or are crafty or whatever else the ego tells you to disavow that need within divinely given to you to create. The ego is crafty as them all by telling you that until you get to a certain status, income or whatever, that this Mission stuff be best left to those who have the ability to do so.

In the theatre, there is a much heralded saying that says, “There are no small parts, only small actors.” Of course, it has been misused as a quote used to those who get small parts in a production who desired bigger roles, but the concept is not without merit. I learned that early on when i, too, desired a bigger part and got a smaller role. In a sense, it was that role that turned on a switch for me as i discovered the power of a smaller role and the truth about all parts of a production.

I even illustrated this point to a cast of actors during a production once. It seemed that they were being a bit disrespectful to the backstage crew, essentially being talent-snobs, as i would call them, and i set out to prove the dynamic of that saying. I told the actors that they would do the show at the rehearsal with the crew watching. As the show progressed, the actors struggled doing all of the things they took for granted that the crew did to make them look good.

It proved a point that those actors learned about appreciation for all who were involved in the show at every level.

There is even a larger lesson that came from that lesson, and that was appreciation for the Mission in general. The ego is such a controlling core concept that appreciation is lost for living in general. Life is a struggle, the ego tells you, and there is no way to appreciate EVERYTHING.

This is at the very core of your Mission. Appreciation for the journey and for the freedom to allow the Mission to become you.

In the next post, come back for the ways to manifest that within yourself and maybe you will find that your Mission has been in front of your eyes without your knowledge.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Mindfulness and Living With Vision

As humans with stories that we tell that become our existence, not only do we become those stories, but we use them as a way to define moments lived solely in the future. The future becomes a continuation of the stories and not a place lived in love, a place lacking a Vision or mission. The future is then the ever-present reality of that place we are always striving for in the past.

While it is mindful to imagine a future filled with things, as it is the human condition to have goals, there is a danger here. Goals are not Vision, but are merely subsets thereof. It is in the bible that the words are penned, “Where there is no vision, the people perish” but here is the distinction.

As creatures of expansion, as has been given to us by our creator and is the way of the universe, we sometimes mistake Goals for Vision. You can have a goal to make a certain amount of money, but that is just a thing, a tangible object that defines your pursuit.

But Vision is completely different; the definition, besides the obvious of someone seeing, is:

1. Unusual competence in discernment or perception; intelligent foresight: a leader of vision.
2. The manner in which one sees or conceives of something.
3. A mental image produced by the imagination.
4. The mystical experience of seeing as if with the eyes the supernatural or a supernatural being.

You see, Vision carries an extra dynamic and has all of the component of mindfulness built into it. Vision is that process of not just seeing some thing to be obtained, but really a larger-than-yourself experience to better the human condition.

Vision carries the very presence of living completely in the Present Moment because, quite frankly, when you think in a supernatural realm, you intrinsically know that there is only this Now Moment to achieve Vision. It seems like a dichotomy, two especially mutually exclusive or contradictory concepts, that cannot possibly work together.

How can having a Vision to change the world NOT be totally future based?

For the simple reason that when you release the ego and go outside yourself, there is only a passion that must live in this Present Moment alone. You have only this Present Moment alone to be the person of change, the person of Vision. You must first be that vision for yourself, and then it becomes the driving force for living life.

In the concept of a theatrical experience, Goals would be like opening a show, Opening Night, while the vision would be to change the way the very experience of theatre is perceived to the people you serve. You introduce art and beauty to a world that maybe had limited, if any, exposure prior to this point.

That is Vision. To raise the experience of the beauty of art to another level that transcends the Opening Night experience. The Vision then becomes a mission to impact the human condition.

Remember as you create goals, that it is really about having a Vision for who you are as a person of quality. Be more than merely goals. Become the Vision and lose your ego to the greater good. Then you will truly experience beauty in living, a true love for life.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Mindfulness In The Present Moment

There is a way of living that really encompasses all truth of living now, living in the present moment. Really, to sum it up in a word, it is Mindfulness.

So, while everyone seems to know intrinsically what the words is, lets get the official definition of mindfulness.

Definition of Mindfulness:

Mindfulness refers to being completely in touch with and aware of the present moment, as well as taking a non-evaluative and non-judgmental approach to your inner experience. For example, a mindful approach to one's inner experience is simply viewing "thoughts as thoughts" as opposed to evaluating certain thoughts as positive or negative.

So there you have it. But an interesting side note says that while the word seems to have a Spiritual dimension, as the term comes from Eastern spiritual and religious traditions such as Zen Buddhism, there are mental health professionals that are beginning to recognize that mindfulness can have many benefits for people suffering from difficulties such as anxiety and depression.

I believe the most dynamic aspect of mindfulness is indeed the element of “taking a non-evaluative and non-judgmental approach to your inner experience.” This is by far the most interesting aspect as most are unable to shut the judgment factor down as if the ego is not going to allow you to, even for a moment, be as one with your environment.

Let me tell you what judgement does. It’s pervasiveness of the soul rids you of truly being at one with the present moment. it stops you from allowing those individuals who you may not ordinarily allow within your sphere to associate with you. it robs you of inner peace and keeps you from recognizing true joy. Judgement of yourself, and of others, stops you from growing and developing a relationship with the universe that lifts, not only you, higher, but others as well.

In a well documented study by Dr. David Hawkins who talked about the levels of consciousness, it was discovered that just one person developing an elevated sense of self, would lift many, many others in the very wake of that enlightened state.

I am confident that you have certainly seen it in action in your own life, when noticing a room where there seems to be a general attitude of gloom and a dynamic soul enters the area. Do you notice that the room’s essence increases? It is as if one enlightened soul can bring the entire room up. That, in its essence, is the dynamic of a good leader; Someone who can inspire the masses.

As a director in live theatre, I have had the occasion of having guest actors or directors involved in a production and it is as if the same local actors that had been involved in a previous productions, all of a sudden acted at a different level. It was as if the professional elevated them by their mere presence - and they did!

Look at mindfulness as that exact same emotion. It lifts you to a higher level and because you have been lifted, others will experience a similar emotion, many times without realizing it.

Practice mindfulness
Embrace mindfulness
Be mindfulness

And live in the Present Moment, the Now Moments of your existence, as a traveler of love, for here is where all of the future lies waiting.

In the next in the series, we will look at ways you can become mindful as it is not as easy as one may believe it to be.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Now Moment coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing the beauty of this Now Moment with a renewed passion for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Theme of Goals; There Is No Place Like Home

“You were able to get there any time, dear. Just tap your heels together and say, "There is no goal I can’t reach, there is no goal I can’t reach, there is no goal I can’t reach.”

OK...so I took some liberties with that infamous quote from the Wizard of Oz where Dorothy finds that she always had the power to get home. (Uhh, thanks Good Witch Glenda for that little piece of info, by the way. Would have been extremely helpful before the flying monkeys came around!)

But now that I think of it, I guess that is the point of it all. We all have to take our own journey down the Yellow Brick Road or we don’t appreciate the joy of the journey. But when it comes to those dastardly things called “Goals”, we are not unlike Dorothy at all, are we not? But the difference is that we are probably more like the Cowardly Lion, the Tin Man and the Scarecrow; We lack courage, a heart and a brain and become nothing more than fodder for the flying monkeys.

Now, as a Now Moment thinker, this may seem a bit odd me talking all goals and such, but I assure you I am still imminently in the Now Moment. Goals are our “Opening Night” as we relate theatrical endeavors. We set them up and then we rehearse each and every Now Moment towards being ready for them when it is time. Where most fall down in the process is not so much in the setting of Opening Night, but in the rehearsal schedule.

What do I mean?

You see, before we ever even audition for the people to fill the roles, we have to have a rehearsal schedule in place. The roles, of course, are the people and events that have to happen to fulfill our goals. Even if it is a somewhat focused goal, as the old saying goes, “No man is an island”. No matter what the goal is, there are most likely people and circumstances that involve others to get you to Opening Night; that which is your goal.

Where we become heartless, brainless and lacking in courage is that we set an ambitious goal and then just say it over and over like that is supposed to give it some type of meaning and never bother to set a rehearsal schedule. In fact, like most New Years resolutions, we set it, and go full force into it and then burnout as we realize it is seemingly unattainable. It would be like giving an actor chosen for a show the script, telling him or her that we will rehearse the play tonight, learn it all, and open tomorrow night.

Can you imagine the horror?

Anyone who has ever acted can tell you of having dreams of that very fright. Curtain opens and you know none of your lines.

The point is that the rehearsal schedule for your goals is really no different. By breaking the goal into tiny little rehearsal-night pieces, you ready yourself for Opening Night one Now Moment at a time.

Opening Night is out there but here is the difference between the egoic nature and Now Moment thinking. The egoic nature has you obsessing about all that might, could or should go wrong on Opening Night, forgetting about rehearsing. Now Moment thinking says, we are as excellent as we can be in this Now Moment and are confident that Opening Night will reflect our excellence in each Now Moment.

Set your rehearsal schedule before you audition for the show and the theme of your goals will always be peace in your Now Moments. You then will indeed be able to tap your feet and say, “There is no place like home.”

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Now Moment coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing the beauty of this Now Moment with a renewed passion for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com