Anxiety: 3 Ways to Identify the Root Cause

There are so many ways that anxiety seems to rear its ugly head in a society that treasures achievement, sometimes to the detriment of living itself.

Strong words, maybe, but i am not here to tread lightly as i have no desire to coddle anyone when it comes to living victoriously in the love of life.

It seems as if we are expected to “be” so much, are we not?

But sometimes in the very act of becoming, we simply forget to just “Be.” We allow so many influences, from family and friends, to society-at-large, to set the tone for our living. We become, then, filled with an angst that stems from so many voices crying out to us, seeming in our own heads. It is the call of expectations of all in our lives who demand that we are “more”, whatever that is.

More than what? More than who? And more importantly, WHY?

The past beacons us, our “so-called” failures beseech us, our ego compares us and we sink deeper into the abyss, often falling on the weight of fears of a future that we can not support or even imagine.

Why are you anxious? What are the signs and symptoms we should be dealing with here? And, the real question; Who are you in the process?

As a Life Coach, this is the area that seems to be the most pressing for most i encounter. Anxiety, worry, angst, depression...they are all tied into a precarious knot that can doom many and even lead few to consider even taking their own lives.

But there is always a core that the anxiety covers and that is the journey we take to discover the beauty of living in the Present Moment, for here is where all truth lives. This is the Now Moment that we find a way up and out and into a new way of living.

But the ultimate truth is always our own journey that must be discovered. To truly rid yourself of the anxiety in any situation, or just in your daily living, you must do some basic self-reflection steps to have the insight to move forward. Be it with a Life Coach, or through meditation, or just taking yourself fishing...whatever it takes to gain some clarity, it needs to be done.

My father had a peculiar saying that he would spout when Alzheimer's had taken its grip on him and that was, “Hey, did you stop and smell the roses?”

Seemingly out of nowhere, he would interject the saying into conversations. Now my father would occasionally say that growing up, usually as a glib saying, but the simple fact is that there is an ultimate truth here for life. It is a quote that is thrown about so much that we do sometimes forget its significance.

A famous golfer, Ben Hogan, said it beautifully when he said, “As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.”

3 Ways to Begin the Transition Away from Anxiety

Anxiety is a far reaching subject, to be sure, but as it was in the theatre, to get ready for the production of any theatrical production, there are things that have to happen before we even get to rehearsals. We have to consider a lot of factors before even choosing the show and consider all of the elements that go into the production.

The three ways we begin the process is similar then to getting ready for a show; separation, reflection and connection.

When preparing for a show, the separation usually comes from a director getting with the board of directors to choose a vision for a production asking such questions such as, do we do a comedy or is a musical good now?

So when it comes to setting the stage for getting to the heart of your anxiety, you must be willing to prepare.

Step 1: Separation

The goal is to separate ourselves in an atmosphere free from distractions; yes that means your precious smart phone, tablet or laptop.

Silence is golden here.

Take time for yourself to free yourself from the rush and crush of life for a bit.

The Second Step: Self Reflection

This is the step that may be the most heartfelt, or should be. This is you identifying the root core and being completely honest with who and where you are in this current moment. Putting all angst aside, you are indeed present in this moment.

So in this Now Moment, the worry that brought you to this point has nothing to do with this moment, so drop it. You are here, be here completely Now. Do not allow the future that your ego is painting for you to exist. Make your own rules, which leads us to the third step.

Step 3: Connection or Connectivity

Such as is preparation to start the theatrical production, these are the components that you have identified in your reflection stage that will move you away from angst; the concepts, people, places and things that you need to begin the process of looking towards the light that is your life. This is the process of the understanding that there is always a way forward.

In the end, it is a solitary journey that opens itself up to the resources the Universe provides for those who are willing to allow for a brighter future. Anxiety is not a way to live in this Present Moment and has no place here. Let’s begin the process together for while it is indeed a solitary journey, you are never alone.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Journey of Enlightenment, Part III; The Flow of it All

One would think that flow is all anyone ever really does, as if we have a choice. But that is the very nature of Flow, we do have a choice and yet so few seem to exist there within it.

First, a practical look at the definition and how we apply it to living in the Present Moment.

The dictionary definition simply states that Flow is simply the “moving along or out steadily and continuously in a current or stream: "from here the river flows north" and “The action or fact of moving along in a steady, continuous stream.”

There is another definition to flow that many words are not given and that is from a perspective of psychology.

Flow, in this instance, is defined as the mental state of operation in which a person in an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and success in the process of the activity.

Proposed by Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, the positive psychology concept has been widely referenced across a variety of fields.

According to Csíkszentmihályi, flow is completely focused motivation. It is a single-minded immersion and represents perhaps the ultimate in harnessing the emotions in the service of performing and learning. In flow, the emotions are not just contained and channeled, but positive, energized, and aligned with the task at hand.

To be caught in the ennui of depression or the agitation of anxiety is to be barred from flow.

The hallmark of flow is a feeling of spontaneous joy, even rapture, while performing a task, although flow is also described as a deep focus on nothing but the activity – not even oneself or one's emotions.

Colloquial terms for this or similar mental states include: to be on the ball, in the moment, present, in the zone, wired in, in the groove, or owning.

What is important to note from the standard definition of moving along or out steadily and continuously in a current or stream and the flow of complete focused motivation, the single-mindedness of it all, is the the principle of advancement in a natural and creative expression of nature. The river flows as it does and when we embark on a Flow within ourselves, we become a joyful creature, a true force of nature that moves at a constant and ever-evolving persona of love.

Flow becomes who we are and embodies our journey. There is nothing that determines how we flow or the way we should flow; We Just do in a way that is natural to us.

Here is where flow is interrupted, and it is at the core of the three step process of Release, Let Go and Flow. At the very heart of the process, there is a Dam that has blocked flow. Something that you have allowed in your life. For what ever reason that it has served you at the time, your Dam has stopped you from your true nature; the very art of Flowing into each new Now Moment.

As a kid, i witnessed the awesome power of the Mississippi River as storms caused it to leave its banks most every Spring. You see, the government, in its infinite wisdom, devised a series of dams along the river to "contain" the flow of the mighty Mississippi River.

Not so much.

When nature would intercede and the river would leave its banks, i was often amused as to the news reports of the damage that was caused because of the river doing what it was supposed to do, the very act of flowing. All of a sudden the river is a destructive force, but it was the very act of the government trying to control nature that was at the core of the destruction.

When nature decides to do what it does, we are simply in the way. Such is the nature of flow and the self-imposed Dams of life are at the heart of anxiety, worry and fear.

You see, we are creatures of flow that are supposed to have a natural rhythm, an ease to the way of living. If you have Dammed up your flow, then you must undo the unnatural aspects of your nature and return your life back over to you.

You must Release by forgiving.

You must Let Go by truly forgetting and deciding that you are the only one responsible for you; that no one else has input unless it is from a mentoring point-of-view that guides, but never insists on its own way.

You must then let nature, the very nature of who you are as an individual, allow Flow into each Present Moment alone, for therein lies your eternity.

Life truly begins when you have learned that the nature of Flow allows the very truth of who we are as eternal beings to enter and create our reality. For we are Love and from Love, all extends outward. Love is the creative force for all that we are and for all that we are to become.

Flow is Love and it is our nature to live free within the Flow.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Enlightenment, The 3 Steps, Part II: The Letting Go

Have you ever heard anyone say, I forgive such and such but i will never forget it?

It is like going to a family function that most dread during any holiday season. You have grown and matured and maybe even have a larger view of the Universal Way than most in your family, and this is not an egoic statement, but a journey that you just understand that you have taken.

But you get home and all you hear from your family is how you failed at this as a kid or did this stupid thing or that stupid thing. You know, the natural process of growing up and learning what works and what doesn’t for yourself that we all go through, but somehow has not been branded on you as an anchor against moving forward.

It is as if your family, no matter how much you have grown and developed, can’t “let it go.” Family members and old friends, (but it seems that they are sometime a bit more progressive) are hell-bent on keeping you forever that little snot-nosed little kid that couldn’t do anything right.

Even Jesus said as much when it was discussed about when he went home when he was on his earthly mission. The townsfolk said, “Isn’t this the carpenter’s son? Come on, nothing good has ever come from our town.” Which led to the saying that a prophet is neglected even in his own home town.

The point is, as was discussed in the last post about releasing, the forgiving of those parts of your past that have kept you tied in the past, might have been the easy part.

Even though the emotions of forgiveness are not always easy and must be dealt with, how can you truly know if you have been successful in completely forgiving?

That is the essence of step 2; Letting Go.

We began with the picture of a family reunion and most understand as they have been there. Families have a pecking order and no matter how much you achieve, you always will be that kid who did the thing that everyone talks about to keep you forever reminded where you came from.

To really move forward, to find that enlightenment that must become your Now Moment reality, you must Let Go. You must Forgive AND Forget; You must Let Go.

At the core, Releasing and Letting Go seem to be very similar in nature but they are a continuation upon one another. You can’t Let Go if you have not forgiven yourself, first, and then the person or situation second.

There is a great quote from Tina Turner where she says, “Sometimes you've got to let everything go - purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything . . . whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you'll find that when you're free, your true creativity, your true self comes out.”

The process of Letting Go is really just that; purging of all that has held you back and at the core of that is, indeed, forgiveness of yourself and others.

This is the truth of allowing joy to come into your soul.

Accept responsibility for yourself and don’t be a victim to anyone's idea of you and who you should be based on a now-gone past that has no barring on this Now Moment. Yes, it existed but it was as is the wake of a boat, it merely shows you where you have been, it should never be an anchor to keep you there.
In the end, it as as the ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu says, “He who knows himself is enlightened.”

You must Forgive and you must Let Go, for here is the beginning of all understanding. Then, as we will discuss in Part 3, Flow, will become your natural state of being

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com
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There is an interesting show on HBO, by the very name, Enlightened. In this show, a once high-powered executive, played brilliantly by Laura Dern, has a breakdown and is committed to a rehab clinic where she has an Enlightened moment of Supreme Consciousness.

Supreme Consciousness is as if, for a brief moment, (and that is what these moments are many times) a peace and serenity comes over your being. Your every waking moment from that point onward then becomes a re-creation of that moment in your expression of living.

Unfortunately, as Laura Dern’s character comes to find out, everyone is not on the same path as you, and it is unfathomable how anyone could not understand the journey as you are living it. I mean, it is very clear that enlightenment must be something that everyone desires, right? How is it that your new found place in the Universal Stream is not something desired by all?

This, then, becomes the disconnect. This, then, becomes the reason your ego steers you clear from “those” types, for it is not normal, this “enlightened” nonsense, and you certainly don’t ever want to be seen as “not normal”.

Right?

It has always fascinated me how the media paints "normalcy." But here is the thing...it is a moving target that changes by the shifting sands of time and societal nuances. The normal of today becomes the old-fashioned thinking of yesterday, and sometimes virtually overnight. If you want to see that really played out, look at computer magazines from merely five years ago. Heck, go back two years, that should do it. The computing world has changed so dramatically that simply having a cell phone two years old makes you outdated.

The same goes for normalcy as we define it. What does this have to do with enlightenment and the steps to begin the journey?

Everything, for you see this is a journey that leaves the boundaries of normalcy behind, for you are desiring a state of joy. Joy has no boundaries and is never out of fashion. Enlightenment is that journey that always begins within and creates change in a way that becomes your normal, without.

But many fear this journey because of the ego. In your attempts to reconcile even a fraction of enlightenment with your world, you must deal with the egoic world around you and that is the arena that the ego so delights in taking charge for it has had so much experience with it.

So there is this constant battle between the ego, future-based, whats-in it for-me thinking, and enlightenment, the serve-humanity-become-a-creature-of-love-in-all-circumstances thinking. This is definitely two words that cannot coexist in any way and to delude yourself into thinking that you can make them “play nice” together is a thinking that shall not bode well for you.

There is a fork in the road and no part of one can go with the other. Enlightenment and the ego are not partners, friends or symbiotic entities that could serve one another.

So the three steps, as alluded in the previous post, are a simple easy-to-remember trio of Release, Let Go and Flow, but living them is not so easy to do.

Step 1: Providing you have dealt with the ego, if nothing else but to acknowledge the fact that you have let it be the CEO for far too long, this is the easiest and yet, at the same time, the most difficult step. Again, the ego will really rear its ugly head here, but push onward. Release is really an act of forgiveness; of yourself, of the events, people, places and things that may have deposited you in this Now Moment.

There is no judgement here. It is as it is supposed to be and there is no desiring anything else to have happened. There are no “should of’s”, “if only’s” or “what if’s”. There is only Now and it is the moment that all is well.

Release and forgive all.

In the spiritual realm, forgiveness is the key for really moving forward. All spiritual doctrines have at their core the very concept of forgiveness. It is only when they attach some sort of gain or punishment that it becomes deluded and watered down as an ineffective vehicle for enlightenment.

But this is the step that begins the journey in earnest. This is the basis of the allowing the truth about yourself as a true child of the Universal Way. Once you have taken this step of forgiveness, true release can be the only truth that you know. It is as if you take from your eyes the “rose colored glasses” that people say when they (their ego) determines that you are living in some “la-la land” that is the journey of enlightenment. You now see in full color and the beauty of every Now Moment comes cascading to you.

For the clients i serve, i use the analogy of the hit program and movies, ‘The Highlander.”

In the series, there are those who are immortal, except for one small exception, other immortals can make them not-so-much by taking their head and gaining the one who lost their head their soul’s power. The liner from the show was, “There can be only one” meaning that only one Highlander was to remain at the end.

This is the process you must undergo in your path of forgiveness.

Metaphorically, you take take the “head” of all the situations in your life that have held you tied to the past or that has kept the present from advancing you into the glorious Now Moments that make up your future Now Moments. You take back the power you have allowed them to have.

Yes, part of the forgiving is that understanding that you cannot be a victim here. Yes, things may have happened that you did not desire, but you are not a victim, but one who overcomes; one who forgives and moves into the next step of Letting Go.

In the next post, we will see how the blending of these steps set you up to set your foot on the path of enlightenment, the Flow of it all.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Enlightenment - How Do You Begin The Journey

Enlightened souls are sometimes so out of step with the seeming existence of everyone else. One often wonders how they get along in this world. It is as if, then, enlightenment is reserved for a privileged few and, at best, the enlightened are a bit quirky.

However, it is this very quirkiness that draws us to enlightened souls, is it not? But upon closer observation, it is the world in which everyone desires to “fit in” by being as normal as possible is the one out of step. The enlightened actually live in a realm where their normal is that eternal state of joy that comes with the connection to Source, the very ebb and flow of the Universal Consciousness that we are all connected to.

Now, before you decide that enlightenment is just some head-in-the-clouds escapism, let me assure you it is anything but. You see, to truly exist in joy, you must be ready to rid yourself of certain assumptions that will forever bind you to the normalcy that exist in the commonality of a daily existence.

You must be willing to go deep within yourself in a way that completely rids yourself of the egoic-nature than binds you to a world that has kept you in a fog, of sorts.

One might say that enlightenment is a journey, first, and an awareness of the greatness of love from which all life derives. This is not a romantic love, of course, but a love for the humanity of the souls you travel with. Love is the vehicle and the place of joy that you see all who you come into contact with is your journey.

There is a release when you lose yourself but here is the journey most don’t seem to desire to allow themselves. There are so many, the ego with tell you, that will think this or that of you and you certainly don’t want to disappoint anyone. There are responsibilities that must take precedent to pie-in-the-sky thinking. There is life that must be dealt with and you certainly cant do that in this eternal state of bliss.

You see the disconnect here?

It is as if becoming an enlightened thinker, then, is solely the pleasure of academia, the artistic elite or one who would escape the masses by becoming a hermit on a mountaintop. Enlightenment is just not something “responsible” people do.

There is turmoil here between the egoic nature within and the eternal stream of consciousness. However, there can be only one. There must be a losing of ones self so as to live in another realm, the ones we were designed to be within from the beginning.

So, how do you begin your journey?

As stated before, the first step is to really look at the ego that drives you. How are you serving it, feeding it? (yes, you are serving it, not the other way around.) This is a real state of self-awareness here as you become honest with yourself.

Unfortunately, many have become so intertwined with their ego that to even think of losing it is almost sacrilegious. It has been heralded as that driving force for success, but really has nothing to do with passion at all.

So, number one is the release of the ego.

You must think of the ego as an employee of the company known as “You, Inc.” This company seeks to serve the common good, does it not? However, the ego has made itself CEO, President, Top Dog, or whatever title you relate to. Essentially, it has deemed itself in charge of you and you do whatever it says to make sure the company stays afloat, no matter what the cost to “You, Inc.”

Here is the thing...the ego is not in it for the long-haul and has no interest in the common good or eternity. The ego cares not about this Now Moment as it uses your past against you as a way to worry about your future. Good thing it is around, isn’t it?

Probably not.

So, you must take back your company. Relegate the ego to the mailroom of “You, Inc.” if you are unable to fire it completely. Maybe you just have to do it in stages.

This is the beginning and, beware here, your ego will tell you that it is needed as CEO, of course, and that you have too many counting on you to not for it not to be in charge.

Essentially, the ego is the Borg...

”Resistance is Futile!”

Release, Let Go and Flow, which we will cover in the next post, will get you to that place where you can truly begin the process of enlightenment.

This is the only place where joy lives.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Enlightened Souls And The Enlightened Journey

Enlightenment is one of those concepts that seems to be a place that many seem to venture carefully. I mean, what is it anyway? Always the image of Buddha comes to mind, meditation and other things “those” people do, but not “average” people, right?

I’ve used humor in my life as a way of shelter me from the storms of life and to get close to people so as to reach into their souls wherein lies enlightenment.

What do i mean?

Well, as an actor, i loved comical roles, for one, i seemed pretty good at them because of the very reason that depth of soul is more compelling in making comedy work that drama. When i started directing, It never failed that I would have a lot of people try our for comedic plays because people thought they were more attuned to doing comedic roles. I mean who doesn’t want to laugh, right, and who doesn’t want to make people laugh. It is a way to connect.

But you see, comedy, the best comedy, has a soul about it that really reaches to enlightenment. Think about your favorite comedians. The ones that really make you laugh are the ones that make you think as well. They are, in a sense, enlightened and yet, they understand that they must use comedy to portray that aspect of themselves that thinks on a deeper level, that part of them that really speaks to the human condition.

What, then, is enlightenment?

It is the state of being enlightened, essentially, the attainment of spiritual knowledge or insight. Here is where many fall down. The mere word “Spiritual” in our society elicits such strong emotions, but at the core of spiritual pursuits are seldom a religious dogma. Instead, it is the very act of seeing and desiring to become a vision larger than your ego desires you to be.

Enlightenment, then, is that perennial state of growth and expansion. You should be desiring this state as you journey from this Present Moment into the next.

There is an old sales expression that goes, “When you are green you are growing, when you are ripe you are rotten.” The way it was explained to me by a sales mentor i once had was that many sales people get to a point where they think they have seen every sales situation there is They seem to know everything about sales and people in general. “Usually,” he would tell me, “these people get to a point that they stagnate and become disillusioned with the joy of sales. They blame everyone who they come into contact with, but seldom look at the real reason in the mirror.”

What he was telling me was that they thought they had become enlightened when it came to their profession, but, in reality, they had stopped growing, learning, and appreciating the journey.
They had become “ripe.”

This is a journey you must take, however. Don’t become “ripe” in your situation. Don’t allow the ego to tell you that it has everything under control; that you should just continue on the way you have been, in the rut that seems well traveled, but safe.

Let us journey together as we go deeper into enlightenment and joy, for they are indeed synonymous. In this series of posts, we shall look at ways to become enlightened and live at an exceptional level for, therein, is where life begins and thrives.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Affliction of Worry From Others

Worry kills the spirit of the one it inhabits and infects those around them.

Why does this happen that a soul on a beautiful journey of love allows such an egoic, unhealthy and, very often, irrational look a a future that does not exist into their very existence.

Why has worry been given such a place of respect in our world.

It is even joked about as a redeeming trait in movies. But there lies the insidiousness of it, does it not? The idea that it is indeed fodder for ridicule and yet we allow it to still infect our lives. It as if we are saying it is funny for everyone else, but, its OK for me. As if somehow that makes it a great way to carry on in our Now Moments.

Of course, that is the point. In the wake of worry there are no Now Moments, only moments that are somehow "out there" that must be going to happen, must be dealt with now.

I could go on for many Now Moments here, but the most troubling aspect of worry is the way we allow others to impact our journey with their worrisome attitude. Really, when someone else worries about you in some situation and projects that worry on you, it is nothing but their ego rising to control you.

Let me give you an example of a client who recently took a tumble off of a ladder and broke his back.

Now this man has an excellent attitude and takes a very youthful approach to age in general. Well, after he recuperated, he came and saw me and was having some issues with the thoughts of others that he was allowing to impact him. Essentially, others were telling him that he should not go up on the ladder again. I asked him if he desired to, if he enjoyed getting up on the ladder doing things. He said that he did, that it was not a chore.

So we established that it was not something he dreaded but that he loved to do, he loved being active. I then asked if others were responsible for his happiness; could they determine his course.

He again said no.

I then told him that others were simply projecting fear onto him because that is how they would have handled their fear, more than likely. It even spoke to their wanting to control him by telling him he was not able to overcome a mere accident.

After we finished, he looked back at me as he left and said, “Thank you. I am so tired of others deciding for me my joy in any moment.” I told him that it was none of his business what others thought of his actions and, quite frankly, if he wanted to skydive, it was his business.

He did go up the ladder again!

You see, we have a way of inserting ourselves into the lives of others, often time in the very name of love and we couch it as “concern" (worry) for them. But really what is going on, is our ego is impacted by them and we are always, if ego-driven, looking to protect ourselves by maintaining that relationship on our terms.
In a way, it is like when we lose a loved one. We mourn, but it is always about the way we are affected. If it is someone close, we are affected as to the time that we no longer will spend with that person in our lives.

Not that it is good or bad, here. It just it is what it is.

But if we grieve past the normal stages of grief that have been studied from author, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, when she discusses the Five Stages of Grief, then we must look at the hold the ego has on the very act of living.

It is the same when it comes to the influence others have on you if you base your life on what others think of your actions. To be quite honest, however, you might be shocked just how little others are thinking about you. I am always amazed at the amount of ego that is present when someone is so invested in others thoughts of their actions. Often it is someone who is very self-conscious and seems very non-egoic, but it is usually just the opposite. Usually the ego has such a hold on them that they base every action on the ideas, words and presumed thoughts of others.

One of my favorite quotes i use for my clients is one from Dr. Seuss where he says,


“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”

It is your journey. Things are only Bad or Good in the context of the moment, but it is always your journey.

No one can worry you better, angry, happy or any other emotion that others desire to afflict you with.

Feel this Present Moment, for it is the only one you have.

Be your own creation and do not allow others in inflict their egoic natures on you, for they are on their own journey.

In the end, it really does come down to the fact that what others think of you is, indeed, none of your business...ever!

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Life Begins When Worry No Longer Impacts Your Journey

In such a climate of fear that we have seemed to allow ourselves to arrive within in this Present Moment of living, one must wonder how it is that we have come to such a place. How is it that souls of love that we are all truly destined to become, allow this fear of living, fear of life to pervade our very existence.

The common thread, it is my belief, is worry.

Let me come at it in a different way than most would. Worry is that common emotion of the soul that has no place, ever, within us, yet we seem to excuse it in ourselves and find it repugnant in everyone else.
My, oh my, the ego is a powerful little beast, is it not?

How often do we tell someone else not to worry, when that is our inclination. It is almost as if we are expected to worry about life in so many ways and if we don’t we, of course, are “flighty” or “cold-hearted” or we are irresponsible in some way. Imagine that, the very act of NOT worrying and staying true to who you are makes you irresponsible.

Can you imagine if you decided to travel the world and, because you set out on a journey of self discovery, you are labeled as irresponsible. Isn’t that the height of responsibility; being labeled as such when truth is what you desire? Isn’t the very act of discovering yourself indicates that you are in search of becoming a better person of love to enrich the human condition?

If you find yourself living is such fear as to not make that journey, then merely look at the program, The Amazing Race, where teams travel around the world in a short amount of time. What most take from the race who participate is the journey within that transforms them and their relationships with not only one another, but with humanity.

By seeing other cultures and participating in tasks that many times test their assumptions about themselves, the individuals find that their fear of truly living was baseless. That their worry about life, in general, was nothing more than the ego’s attempt to “protect” them.
Protect them from what? Not sure, but the ego tells you countless things to worry about in life.

Really, however, the journey is from the allowing of love to enter them. Love of themselves, love of humanity, love of life and love of the journey within that makes the journey without all worthwhile.

Worry is so baseless that it cripples us from truly living life. The sad fact is that society breeds that fear from childhood on. Oh, I'm not saying that we aren’t aware of our surroundings but we don’t live in a constant state of “what if” this or that happens that we have to do this or that to cover the "what if" to begin with.

As i said in the last post, the ego can play out a scenario to its end based on a “what if” so compelling that you actually believe it to be. Sometimes even so much as to manifest the very worry the ego has so cleverly ‘what if’ed” so the ego can say to you, “See, i told you so.” Then once the ego has you there, you actually feel guilt about not worrying.

Do you see the insidiousness of worry?

There is another component of worry that really is at the core. The ego masks it as “making sure you are good with yourself.” It is the “What others think of me and my decisions” thought pattern as a guide for living truth in your life that is your journey alone. Yes, we impact others with our lives, that is the very nature of living. However, if you come from a place of truth, from a place of love, then you will not be a concerned how you impact others. There will be no worry about your actions or the actions of others.

The very thought that your belief that others thoughts the ones that you assign to them, about you, are somehow a determinant for living your life is bizarre.

However, It happens all the time.

Someone gives you a look and you assign that look a series of thoughts, usually based on experiences from the past of a similar look. So then you get angry, do something completely different or think a new series of thoughts all based on a look. The ego goes into full-protection mode to align you to the world as it sees it, which is not reality at all.

In the next post, we will delve into the very nature of the living in such a Now Moment state of love that there is nothing any one can say to take you away from your journey. It is a conscious decision, but a freeing one.

By the way, the thought you must take from the whole “What others think of me” situation is this:

It is none of your business what others think of you!

Just be true to yourself and come from a place of love in all you do and say.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

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DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

3 Steps to Abate Worry and Live Now

There is nothing that can invade the mindfulness of a true Present Moment thinker such as worry. It is that egoic nature that can take the tranquility of the present Now Moment and give the ego complete and total charge of all that surrounds your Mission. Worry is that ever-present reality, it seems, for most as they travel from Now Moment to Now Moment.

But why is that?

In a study i read recently, it was stated that a mere 8% of things people worried about actually manifested as reality. I would add that of that 8%, probably most things were so desired, so worried about, that they were going to happen no matter what. it is the Law of Attraction in action in a not-so-good use.

So what does that tell us?

It tells us that we are so desperate to desire some unforeseen future that we will manifest it even to the detriment of our very existence. It tells us that the ego will go to extreme lengths to keep a hold on you, because worry is such as life itself. You forget about the actuality of that which might happen for the understanding that it might happen. Essentially, most are in such a common place of worry that when one thing happens that they have indeed worried about, it becomes 100%. It happened just as you thought it would and now the ego can use it to bolster its claim on you as the defender of your safety.

In the world of theatre, it is as i have seen. An actor has an overall great performance and one person out of a hundred tells them that they didn’t like their performance. One person! Guess what happens? That’s correct my young Jedi, they obsess about the one, not taking into context at all why that one person didn’t like it, as if it matters. But i have seen a single bad comment take an actor and make them doubt themselves because they worry about another comment to the point that their performance suffers. So the very thing they worry about does indeed manifest.

Worry, really then, is all about the ego. The funny thing is that we have all done it, have we not? Because worry brings forth doubt in ourselves and our situation, we then define ourselves by the very worry we are in any moment we decide to commit ourselves to it. Even more bizarre is our capacity to see others commit themselves to worry and tell them not to.

But since the ego is really at the heart of worry, how can we make sense of it all? Worry is a natural part of life, is it not? I mean, our very existence is given images of worry in every facet of living by our news media alone. The media feeds on worry and 90% of commercials are worry about some future event happening in your life if you don’t use their product. I have even seen a pill you can take in case you might have heartburn in the future. I am not kidding.

What is the number one cause of heart troubles in the USA alone? Stress. What is stress usually caused by? Worry about some future outcome.

I had a coaching client who recently came to a session in tears. Her daughter was in the midst of a divorce and she was “worried” about the grandchildren and the long-term affect on them. As i probed deeper, as that must always be done with worry, it came out that it her daughter’s divorce was somehow a reflection on her. Her parenting, her life in general. Her ego had so encased her in worry and how it was somehow an attack on her very core, that some perceived outcome with her grandchildren was now keeping her in a state of worry about some unknown future.

You see how clever worry is used by the ego? Ultimately, most worry is somehow an attack on YOU and must be dealt with. Just the absurdity of it all makes most laugh but it is an ever-present danger within us all if we are not vigilant in keeping worry at bay.

Living in the Present Moment is freedom from worry but takes a conscious effort to rid yourself of the egoic nature that inhabits the very core of worry.

3 Steps to Begin the Process of Ending Worry

First, when worry is presented as an option, take it to its end.

What do i mean by that?

Be an actor and write the script. Take the object of worry and make a play out of it, which is what worry is, by the way. The ego makes a whole play out that you actually believe it to be true. This time, however, you write it in your head with whatever far-fetched conclusion that could happen. Make a game of it. There is an old saying that you “illustrate absurdity by being absurd” and this is what is the intent. When you see the ridiculousness of all that must happen for the worry to become manifest, it really is quite amusing.

Second, decide that you are going to be ever-present in this Now Moment and that worry will not determine a future that does not exist. Just the very act of making a solid commitment will alert you when worry rears its ugly head.

Third, acknowledge the egos effort. Now, that might seem a bit strange, but if you treat the ego as it should be, as nothing more than someone from the mailroom, instead of the CEO of the company known as YOU, then you will go far in abating worry.

The ego will tell you all kinds of things to supposedly be in your best interest, but what the ego is trying to do is to be the one who makes all the decisions for you. The sad part is that most allow the ego to be in charge. Take back the night, here. The ego HATES Now Moment living and by keeping you in a constant state of worry about the future gives it full control. Be better than that. Be ever-present in the Now.

Worry is the beast that will rear its ugly head in your life and you must be aware, but it is a beast that can be eradicated for as Benjamin Disraeli was quoted as saying, “Worry (the ego) - a God, invisible but omnipotent. It steals the bloom from the cheek and lightness from the pulse; it takes away the appetite, and turns the hair gray.”

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Appreciation for the Mission in The Present Moment

Appreciation is the core value that manifest a Mission that truly reflects the very nature of the love of life. Appreciation is that beautiful nature that can’t be faked or manufactured, such as you see when Hollywood does with some Thanksgiving feast when a troubled family seemingly comes together and gives feigned appreciation.

For as far as i can remember, i was troubled at something at the way appreciation was portrayed along with the following season. Don’t get me wrong, it is grand to see people become Scrooges for if even for a brief season; the part where Scrooge is transformed, that is.

But only when i took my journey that has set me on my Mission to give people back themselves, did i really understand the depth of appreciation and what it actually does to the soul. It is my belief that at the heart of the very spiritual concept of faith is appreciation. It is appreciation that provides the prism for all of life. It is appreciation for life that we begin to see beyond ourselves.

It goes beyond the concepts of forced “thank yous” we all had to give when our aunt gave us the scarf we didn’t really like, or some other manifested reason appeared that we should be thankful for.

It is in the well-meaning actions of those who loved us that we were given such a skewed look at the very meaning of appreciation in our lives. So many times it comes off as a forced look at a guilt reaction of what someone has done for us. So the appreciation then becomes a bitter pill you swallow that has no meaning outside of the words you utter. Guilt becomes appreciation to the ego and resentment often nest deep within it.

I see it often times with the very act of gift giving where someone gives a gift, expects appreciation, which you have been taught to do, and then proceeds to tell you at some future time, that because they gave you a gift, that a certain action should now be manifest, be it love or some supposed show of love. The ego then drills down to the act of the forced appreciation that you did and begins to feed on the very act of appreciation as a ploy or ruse and bitterness begins to accumulate. Love and appreciation are often time so linked that one would believe that they must coexist together.

Yes and No. For you see, if you come from a place of love, appreciation is at the heart of everything you do, but appreciation must never demand love. Make sense?

This is one of the hardest values to really uncover, for most will tell you that appreciate this and that in their lives, but you can see that appreciation is not their core. To breech this with clients, i often get to the very act of gift giving and have found that most have had (or do) the “weapons of gifts”, as i like to call them, inflicted on them.

What i must first get most over is that a gift, defined in the dictionary as, “A thing given willingly to someone without payment.” is just that.

In the spiritual realm it is often why so many have a hard time with a gift of salvation, in that our ego knows that there are always strings attached, so there is nothing “freely given.” So getting people past that attitude and the very act of doing that to others as well, is the first hurdle. When you can get ego to release the assumptions of gifts, of giving and of the very nature of appreciation, then we can begin to give you back your life starting from that point.

Appreciation is the core value of the Mission for your life and for living from a place of love. Here is where we begin to master looking beyond yourself and seeing that life is indeed a Mission that you are involved in.
Let’s look at three ways to begin the process of Appreciation, but know that we have only touched the surface of having a true Attitude of Gratitude.

In my morning journal practice, i begin with “thank you thank you thank you” and i truly mean it. This is the act of preparation to receive from an attitude of being thankful for all within your life.

First, then, would be to prepare yourself by being thankful form the outset for EVERYTHING. Nothing must exist within your realm that is not appreciated.
In the movie, “A Wonderful Life”, George Bailey, played by Jimmy Stewart, has just discovered that he is back from being “non-existent” and is running down his little street of Bedford Falls. As he is doing so, appreciation for every aspect of his little town spews from his mouth. All of those places he took for granted, now had a new meaning and he appreciated everything for what it was to him. He now lived in an attitude of gratitude and in that light he saw his Mission for living and that he had been on a Mission without really understanding it.

Next, after you have truly given yourself over to appreciation of everything, there is an aspect of release that you must do. Forgiveness must now be your nature. First yourself, and, then, all other people, places and things that the ego has told you have wronged you in any way. This is a process, but one that must take place to move forward. Living free from here means you can now move beyond yourself to a Mission mindset.

Finally, in our simple three step appreciation appreciation manifestation, is to release worry, which is a task in and of itself that affects your Mission, the going beyond yourself to impact humanity.

In the next post we shall proceed form that point and deal with worry as it is a challenge that must have its own discussion.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

The Mission of the Vision

Vision was discussed in relation to goals in the previous post as something to aspire to.

Briefly we discussed goals as merely a subset of the larger vision of a life with a purpose, a Mission for your eternal pursuits.

However, in this ego-driven culture, Mission is often left to those ‘starving artist” and those who dedicate their selves to helping those in need in some remote part of the world or in some place of dire need in our own country.

A Mission often seems to be left to politicians that supposedly have the social good in mind, which we usually discover is seldom the case. Even the very definition of Mission from the dictionary alludes to missions from a standpoint of political and humanitarian efforts.

Therein lies the disconnect.

When we look at Mission then in the eyes of a cynical world, and with an ego that is constantly looking out for your own interest, it seems that a Mission is not really something that everyone is involved in, or should be, for far too many have corrupted the very meaning of the word.

The eternal creator of the universe did not set us adrift to be at the whim of a society that cares not but, in the eternal scheme of it all, desires nothing more than people with vision to lead them into a new age of enlightenment.

Here is where the ego usually shuts the discussion down as Enlightenment, Vision and Missions are certainly not practical. The egoic mind desires only to keep you forever tied to the past and worried about the future in a way to keep you focused on self-preservation, there will certainly be no talk of a Mission outside of yourself, for that is the very act of acknowledging an eternal presence that has no place in the ego-centric mind. Mission stuff is “out there” and reality is nothing more than your failures of the past and of the future, which is always to be worried about.

Often the heartaches of the past, the ego will tell you, would not even allow you to think that YOU, of all people, could have a Mission that could impact the world. This is precisely why you should think of a Mission for your life. Yes, it is tied to Vision and the two are usually so interwoven that it seems to be a daunting task to even conceive of it.

The ego tells you that you are not worthy for greatness, that you cant change the world, that “out there” pursuits are best left to those who are rich, or are crafty or whatever else the ego tells you to disavow that need within divinely given to you to create. The ego is crafty as them all by telling you that until you get to a certain status, income or whatever, that this Mission stuff be best left to those who have the ability to do so.

In the theatre, there is a much heralded saying that says, “There are no small parts, only small actors.” Of course, it has been misused as a quote used to those who get small parts in a production who desired bigger roles, but the concept is not without merit. I learned that early on when i, too, desired a bigger part and got a smaller role. In a sense, it was that role that turned on a switch for me as i discovered the power of a smaller role and the truth about all parts of a production.

I even illustrated this point to a cast of actors during a production once. It seemed that they were being a bit disrespectful to the backstage crew, essentially being talent-snobs, as i would call them, and i set out to prove the dynamic of that saying. I told the actors that they would do the show at the rehearsal with the crew watching. As the show progressed, the actors struggled doing all of the things they took for granted that the crew did to make them look good.

It proved a point that those actors learned about appreciation for all who were involved in the show at every level.

There is even a larger lesson that came from that lesson, and that was appreciation for the Mission in general. The ego is such a controlling core concept that appreciation is lost for living in general. Life is a struggle, the ego tells you, and there is no way to appreciate EVERYTHING.

This is at the very core of your Mission. Appreciation for the journey and for the freedom to allow the Mission to become you.

In the next post, come back for the ways to manifest that within yourself and maybe you will find that your Mission has been in front of your eyes without your knowledge.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Mindfulness and Living With Vision

As humans with stories that we tell that become our existence, not only do we become those stories, but we use them as a way to define moments lived solely in the future. The future becomes a continuation of the stories and not a place lived in love, a place lacking a Vision or mission. The future is then the ever-present reality of that place we are always striving for in the past.

While it is mindful to imagine a future filled with things, as it is the human condition to have goals, there is a danger here. Goals are not Vision, but are merely subsets thereof. It is in the bible that the words are penned, “Where there is no vision, the people perish” but here is the distinction.

As creatures of expansion, as has been given to us by our creator and is the way of the universe, we sometimes mistake Goals for Vision. You can have a goal to make a certain amount of money, but that is just a thing, a tangible object that defines your pursuit.

But Vision is completely different; the definition, besides the obvious of someone seeing, is:

1. Unusual competence in discernment or perception; intelligent foresight: a leader of vision.
2. The manner in which one sees or conceives of something.
3. A mental image produced by the imagination.
4. The mystical experience of seeing as if with the eyes the supernatural or a supernatural being.

You see, Vision carries an extra dynamic and has all of the component of mindfulness built into it. Vision is that process of not just seeing some thing to be obtained, but really a larger-than-yourself experience to better the human condition.

Vision carries the very presence of living completely in the Present Moment because, quite frankly, when you think in a supernatural realm, you intrinsically know that there is only this Now Moment to achieve Vision. It seems like a dichotomy, two especially mutually exclusive or contradictory concepts, that cannot possibly work together.

How can having a Vision to change the world NOT be totally future based?

For the simple reason that when you release the ego and go outside yourself, there is only a passion that must live in this Present Moment alone. You have only this Present Moment alone to be the person of change, the person of Vision. You must first be that vision for yourself, and then it becomes the driving force for living life.

In the concept of a theatrical experience, Goals would be like opening a show, Opening Night, while the vision would be to change the way the very experience of theatre is perceived to the people you serve. You introduce art and beauty to a world that maybe had limited, if any, exposure prior to this point.

That is Vision. To raise the experience of the beauty of art to another level that transcends the Opening Night experience. The Vision then becomes a mission to impact the human condition.

Remember as you create goals, that it is really about having a Vision for who you are as a person of quality. Be more than merely goals. Become the Vision and lose your ego to the greater good. Then you will truly experience beauty in living, a true love for life.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com

Mindfulness: 3 Ways To Allow Mindfulness To Impact the Present Moment

Einstein was right, although wasn’t he about most things? You must indeed keep your balance on a bike, but let me carry it one step further as it relates to being mindful. Not only must you keep your balance, you must keep moving forward and be ever mindful of your surroundings as you do so. Unlike driving a car, which many seem to believe they can do a multitude of other things as they drive around, riding a bike is a very mindful event.

Unlike driving a car which can run over most small obstacles without a concern (of course, many of those small objects, like animals, may not be too excited about your lack of focus), you have to be ever mindful of your terrain, down to the very stick in the road, as you are balancing on two wheels and one slight over-steering results in you seeing what the road looks like in front of you, in a very close and intimate way.

Also, being mindful is being totally connected to the Now-ness of it all. Essentially, we may know where we are going and have plotted our course, but it is in the here and now that the ride happens. If we lose focus for one second, we fall. It is the balance of the moment; the essential mindfulness of the present moment that keeps us forever focused on the immediacy of the journey ahead, for only here can we maintain the safety and security of our ride.

It is as i have said when putting together a theatre production, Opening Night happens one rehearsal at a time. Such it is in life, the journey happens one Present Moment at a time.

There is a trend in the business community for laser focus, thankfully getting away from the concept of multitasking. Admittedly, i am one who has been prone to that, having a lot of things going at once. That it is the director in me, i suppose, as i have to be able to see the big picture when directing a show. When watching several performances at once you have to quickly scan for blending elements of the actors so as to blend all performances of a show. It is a gift, so the concept of multitasking seems not out of line, but as i really understand the directing pursuit, i understand that the creator endows each with gifts and that contained within those gifts are the aspect of focus; a singular, laser like focus. That is mindfulness in its purist form.

3 Tips to Allow Mindfulness Within

1. As stated, like riding a bike and producing a stage play, know your destination, but don’t “Live” there. It is the Opening Night, the objective or goal you desire, that matters. But do not allow the ego to be in charge. Clarity. Exacting clarity with the end in mind is the objective so that the nights of rehearsal make sense.

For example, I would not tell actors that we are doing a show about a couple in love and not really know the way the show is structured. We have a script that we follow. I have found that those without a script have no peace, no mindfulness in the present moment.

2. Be confident in who you are, that you have a purpose and are acting at your highest level. Acting is a fickle beast and the mistake many make as actors as not playing to their strengths.

An example from my beginning years as an actor. It was high school. I was still trying to define myself as an actor as to what i really loved from an acting perspective. I desired the lead role in the school musical, South Pacific. Now. i was definitely not leading man looking material. I mean, I could act it, but i was a scrawny, developing kid. I mean, i took voice lessons and everything, and the kid that got cast in the role was a basketball player who looked the part. Such is acting and such are the lessons learned along the way. Play to your strengths and you will get the roles. You will define the roles that bring you mindfulness in these Now Moments.

3. Don’t take your cue from those around you as to what your role is. Don’t let others define you. You see it in every arena of life. When others define you, you never truly know what role you are playing. Take any politician, for example. When there opponent defines them with some type of negative advertisement, and they fail to respond, they have lost. I’ve seen it as a director. An actor will listen to another actor’s advice on how to do their role and, in the process, lose the effectiveness of the role completely. It is only when you define yourself, and stay true to who you are in your role that you operate at a level of confidence. You are true to you and you are the only one you are truly responsible for.

So Mindfulness equals, Clarity, Confidence and Role Definition. These three components can begin to get you on that bicycle heading in the right direction.

Always remember that it is in this Present Moment alone that gets you to your goal. That is all you have. That is all you will ever have.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

DA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach , teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed passion for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching @ directyourownlife@gmail.com